i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
