I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
