Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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