I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
