i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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