Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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