do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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