Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
