If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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