i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Congratulations! We have a period
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