In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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