I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Randomize