a queef is a wish your heart makes.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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