She said her name was "party"
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
