The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
