Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
