she takes plan B like it's going out of style
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
