I must be too annoying 4 u.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
