Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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