So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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