This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
