i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Randomize
