Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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