it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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