I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
