He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
