he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
