my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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