The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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