i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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