if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
