everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
as a side note pls kill me
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize