barbara walters just said penis...
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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