I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
