His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
