It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
