You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
