.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
