If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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