Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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