he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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