break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
