Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Congratulations! We have a period
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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