I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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