her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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