I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
