I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
