I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
