Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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