If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
